The Claiming of Prince Quatre part 1
By Tralla
Long ago, far away, there existed a kingdom called Wing and a prince named Heero Yuy. He was young, aged 19. And traditional circumstances had put him in a place of power. His father had died in battle and the line was to fall to his issue. Heero’s stepmother, who had taken power in his father’s absence, was to relinquish the throne to the true heir on his 20th birthday, which was only 25 days away. The kingdom buzzed with excitement. It was the custom for the new king to announce the name of his bride on the day of his coronation. But Heero Yuy had found no one worthy at his court, which caused him to seek a bride outside his kingdom.
Much against his better judgment, and spurred by the desire to get the bride-finding business out of the way, Heero Yuy went to soothsayer Une for advice, again...
So began the countdown of 25 days.
And so begins the story of the Claiming of Prince Quatre.
It was a long trek to the tower, where Lady Une, condemned sorceress and soothsayer, resided. Lady Une was deceivingly young in appearance. She seemed but a few years older than the crown prince, himself, when she was in fact pushing two hundred. Heero’s father had spared her life on the condition that she’d serve the royal family for the rest of her days. When given the option of being burned at the stake, Une found little reason to deny the king. And, as far as she could discern from what the future told her, she stood a good chance of outliving the Yuy monarchy, which meant her inevitable freedom.
Heero Yuy was coming to see her. So, her cauldron told her. She patted one of her large buns with her hand.
153 steps. Those were how many one had to climb in order to reach the top of the tower: Soothsayer Une’s domicile. Heero appeared before her in a hunter green shirt, black pants, and tall boots. His family crest, a pair of wings, was embroidered on his right breast. His crown was lost in his wild hair and barely visible.
Une looked up from her cauldron. A live bird was in her left hand, she restrained its wings.
“Torturing animals again?” noted Heero as he approached.
Une smiled a deceivingly matronly grin. “Not quite,” she murmured. “Just teaching this tax collector a lesson. It’s a favor for the little boy who cuts my wood.”
She released the bird and it fell to the stones. “Repent and I’ll turn you back.”
The bird jumped about the stones. It chirped weakly.
“What was that?” Une asked while nudging the creature with the toe of her slipper.
Distraught, the little bird chirped again.
“Good. Good,” murmured Une. “Next time you’ll think twice about hounding the poor.” She began to chant with her eyes closed.
Disinterestedly, Heero watched the bird. It grew still. “You killed it,” he said with his voice devoid of emotion.
“No,” responded Une while opening her eyes. She knelt and carefully took the bird in her hands. “I put him to sleep. It’ll take a day or two before he’s half human and a week before he’s close to his former self.” She walked away and opened a door. She turned back to Heero and said, “It would drive him mad to see his form change. This is the best way. And I don’t have to put up with wretched screaming.” She disappeared into the adjacent room and returned some seconds later without the bird.
She clasped her hands and fixed her gaze on Heero. He was still standing by the door where she’d left him.
“Now, Prince Heero, you have questions you wish me to answer.”
“How do I get a bride with the least amount of effort?”
“Your romanticism is staggering.” Une quelled a sardonic look. “I suppose the best bet would be a meat market.”
“Meat market?” Prince Heero appeared skeptical. “I need a bride, not pork.”
“I mean a bevy of brides from which you can choose.”
“It’ll get crowded,” responded Prince Heero.
From the look on Une’s face, it was evident Heero was already trying her patience. For weeks, he’d climbed the stairs to her tower and asked her the same question before shooting down all her suggestions. She was aware he was against finding a bride, but she could do without him dragging her into it. She frowned. She was bound by duress. If she made any attempt to do away with him, the kingdom would do away with _her_. She’d be lucky if she was just hanged. Burning at the stake, while children roasted marshmallows at her feet, wasn’t on the top of her list of things to do.
Finally, Une commented, “I am out of suggestions, Prince. Either you find some worth in what I have already offered or look for another soothsayer. You have tapped my reserves.”
2 days later
“Hey, hey, still single?”
Heero turned to look at his stepbrother. “Yes, unless I put you in a dress and pass you off as a wife.”
Prince Duo rolled his eyes. “Man, you’ve been saying that for weeks. Sing a new tune. Wing doesn’t do same sex marriages.”
“Who said I wanted to marry you?”
“Yeah…” Wearily, Prince Duo nodded. “It’s the crossdressing. I keep trying to forget about your leanings.” Slowly and then with renewed vigor, Prince Duo unsheathed his sword and began parrying with the air. “You know what I think?”
“You don’t think,” replied Heero.
Unfazed, Duo continued, “I think you need to follow soothsayer Une’s advice. Invite all the ladies from the surrounding kingdoms, get drunk, have a massive orgy, and take whomever you wake up with as a bride.”
“And, while this is all going on, what will _you_ be doing? Watching?”
“You know it,” said Prince Duo with a grin. He aimed his sword at Heero. “Just to make sure you’re up to performing your princely duties. Besides, if you get tired, you can tag me and I’ll step into the ring.”
Heero just stared back at him.
“Hey, what’s with that look? It’s not _my_ fault your father married my mother. We’re stuck with each other. Get over it.”
5 days later, at the Royal Meat Market
“I’m not sure about this, Quatre. I am Prince Heero’s senior by six years. By all accounts, I’m on my way to spinsterhood,” said Princess Iria.
Prince Quatre looked back at his sister. “Iria, with your beauty, genial nature, and my negotiating skills, there won’t be any cause for worry.”
Iria watched her younger brother with slight unease. He’d married off his other 28 sisters using his ‘negotiating skills’. She was the last of the brood. Prince Quatre was one sister away from flawless victory. Though he always appeared bright, happy, and harmless, Iria knew better. He was a shark in a soft-featured prince’s clothing. She watched him crack his knuckles before he took her by the hand. He began to gently but determinedly guide her to the crush of princesses.
“Quatre, you do not need to accompany me. The men are all on the other side of this court.”
There was a smile in Quatre’s voice as he said, “In order to successfully negotiate, I must better acquaint myself with the women who seek your prince.”
Iria just let Quatre lead. Her prince. Quatre had used a possessive pronoun. There was nothing she could do now but watch and listen.
“Harelip, too tall, portly, furry…”
Duo shook his head as he listened to Heero rattle on. There were hundreds of women in the courtyard who had appeared to grab the chance at being future queen of Wing. But Heero, as he surveyed the field of women, seemed bent on thwarting himself. He found something wrong with all of them.
“Limps, is somewhat cross-eyed, has armpit hair…”
Disgruntled and frustrated with Heero, Duo began tapping at the hilt of his sword with his pointer finger. He’d been standing there for a half an hour at Heero’s side waiting for the surly prince to finish his insults, but Heero just kept on going. It didn’t help that more women continued to show up. Duo kept tapping at the hilt of his sword, a sword he had picked up in the Orient two years prior. It was a reverse-blade sword. Duo ceased his tapping and grasped the hilt. He could rough Heero up a bit without leaving too many bruises if he used the dull side of the sword. Anything to get Heero to shut up. But as Duo was about to draw his sword, he realized that Heero had, in fact, gone silent. Duo turned to look at him. Heero’s face was slack with awe.
Skeptical, Duo followed his gaze.
At last Heero said haltingly, “There is a young woman dressed as a prince.”
Duo made a noise of exasperation. “Uhh, Heero? That’s a guy. Get your eyes checked out.” But Duo had cause for relief as his gaze took in the woman who was next to the girly guy who had caught Heero’s attention. “Heh, Heero, I think we just found a ringer.”
Duo snorted. “Yeah. Yeah. Whatever, Heero. As long as there’s gender bending on the horizon, you’re game. Well, save your deviant leanings for another time. Find a bride. You hear me? Aim for the one that’s obviously female. Leave her effeminate companion for another time.”
As he watched Heero, Duo wondered if Heero had even tuned in for part of his tirade. He sighed and followed Heero over to the pair.
Two blondes, one a woman the other a young man. One with blue eyes, the other with bluish-green. One slightly flustered and the other bright and smiling.
“Prince Heero of Wing,” said the young man while bowing. “I am Prince Quatre of Sandrock and this is my sister Princess Iria.”
Iria curtsied. She had gone pale. Penetrating, that was the only word to describe Prince Heero’s gaze. She was too stricken to realize that his gaze was only aimed at one person.
“Sandrock? The desert kingdom to the far east,” murmured Heero.
Prince Quatre continued smiling. “You know of us--”
“And, at Sandrock, both men and women wear long robes?” asked Heero with his gaze locked on Quatre.
Duo’s left eye twitched. He didn’t like where this conversation was going.
“Yes, to protect ourselves from the sandstorms. It is a necessity.”
“Do you favor long robes when there aren’t storms?”
“Heero…” growled Duo.
Both Quatre and Iria looked at Duo.
“Uhhh, yeah. I didn’t introduce myself. I’m Prince Duo, Heero’s stepbrother.” Duo laughed nervously before scratching the back of his head. “Heero has always been curious about other lands’ apparel. Think of it as a quirk. Please.”
“Quirks are charming,” remarked Quatre, “Don’t you agree, Iria?”
“Yes…”
There was a long silence in which Duo began to visibly sweat, Iria looked around nervously, and Quatre fought to keep a smile in place while Heero stared at him without blinking…once.
But the silence was broken when Heero posed a question to the blonde prince. “Do you have a favorite color?”
Prince Quatre thought for a moment. “Anything pastel.”
Heero turned to Duo. Duo appeared both skeptical and exasperated. “That doesn’t mean anything, Heero.”
Heero’s brows furrowed. “Your hand, I would like to see it.”
Quatre blinked back at him before acquiescing.
Heero took it in his for closer inspection. He seemed pleased. He pulled Quatre’s hand and stuck it in Duo’s line of vision.
Duo sighed. “He’s a prince. Of course he has manicured hands. You’re the only idiot who doesn’t clean up for royal meat markets.”
Heero frowned as he released Quatre’s hand. It would be better for him to get straight to the point. He fixed his gaze on Quatre and inquired, “How often do you wear dresses?”
Duo, Iria, and Quatre looked back at Heero with their mouths slightly open. Duo brought a hand to his forehead and moved as though he was about to walk away.
Prince Quatre tried to appear congenial rather than uneasy. “I have no inclination to wear women’s clothing. But Iria, my _sister_, has no such aversion.”
“But, she has breasts…that are not shoulder pads,” remarked Heero while edging away.
At that moment, Duo stepped between them. He had a plastered-on smile. “Could you excuse us for a moment?” He grabbed Heero by the arm and yanked him out of earshot.
“Can you at least _pretend_ to be normal???”
Without comment, Heero looked back at Duo. He saw no problem with anything he’d done.
Disgusted, Duo tried another venue. “You idiot. At this rate, you’ll scare Iria away.”
Heero appeared indifferent.
Duo sighed and shook his head. “Fine. You’ll scare Iria _and_ Quatre away.”
“That is problematic.”
“Finally, I’ve got your attention.” Duo turned to his side. “Why am I stepbrother to such a freak?” He sighed again and turned to face Heero. But Heero was already gone. “What the hell? Where did he go?” Duo turned around, but the crowd of women was like a frilly, floral-scented maze. After some minutes of making his way through the crush, out the corner of his eye, he caught a flash of green, forest green. No woman who was trying to seduce a prince was going to masquerade as a frog. Only Heero had no problem with such an association.
Duo managed to get a clear look, but what he saw kept him planted to the spot.
From his vantage, he saw Heero present Quatre a flower. The blonde prince seemed both confused and reluctant. He edged away from the flower. Heero stuck it under his nose. Duo watched as the blonde’s face contorted. His nose twitched like a rabbit’s on speed. He let go a big sneeze. As soon as he did, 5 guards appeared and seized him. With his mouth hanging open, Duo watched as they dragged the struggling blonde prince away.
Pretty much everyone stood still watching the spectacle.
Duo heard footsteps. He turned and faced Heero. His eyes were still wide as he asked, “What the hell just happened?”
“It’s high treason to sneeze on a member of the royal family,” remarked Heero.
Duo squinted with skepticism. “You just made that up, didn’t you?”
There was silence.
Duo shook his head. “You are one piece of work. Law or not, you set that up. I _saw_ you. You stuck that flower right under his nose!”
“Yes, I did,” replied Heero. “But, now, he can’t be scared away.”
“He’s going to be in a dungeon, Heero. Of course, he can’t run away.” Duo’s face was still slack with disbelief as he watched Heero walk away. His disbelief was compounded by that fact that Heero was whistling.
“He’s losing it.”
Countdown: 18 Days remaining
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Notes (to avoid harangues ^_^)
(1) I wasn’t sure about Iria’s age. I just tacked on 2 years to Lady Une’s official age. If someone knows her age, feel free to inform me and stamp out my ignorance ^_^.