Type type type type type click.

“God damn it,” grumbled Duo. He slammed his fist at the side of the keyboard and then took a quick swig of Coca Cola as compensation. Unfortunately for him, taking a quick swig of a carbonated beverage wasn't a smart idea. The Coca Cola burned its way down his throat. His eyes grew watery, but he could still make out the words on his screen:

Search for 'ejaculatory+inevitability+prevention' returned 70 results.

Yeah, 70 results featuring ways to avoid _premature_ ejaculation, grow a bigger penis, and…stop pregnancy through coitus interruptus. Yeah, like he was really worried about Heero getting him pregnant…Duo sighed and slumped back his chair. What was wrong with this world? He couldn't even find a way to thwart is over eager partner on the Internet…

Duo rubbed his eyes. Then he heard something that sounded like upbeat porno music and then there was a female moan followed by a male moan. He removed his fists from his eyes. It was a pop-up ad. He made a face. That's what he got from using Heero's computer. The sick bastard actually liked pop-up ads.

Mid mental rant Duo actually began to read the ad.

Want Immeasurable pleasure? Tired of finishing first and leaving your lover wanting for more? Sick of women boasting of multi-orgasmic wonders? Well, there's hope. Who said you were down for the count when you felt yourself going over that sensual peak? Well, the pleasure doesn't have to stop there. Multi-orgasms can happen to men too. The trick: Delaying ejaculation. Click here for more

Duo wavered for a moment. His hand hovered over the mouse. Did his eyes just deceive him? He blinked back at the computer screen. The words “Delaying Ejaculation” were like Heaven sent. He was chuckling softly to himself. Click.

“Wufei,” murmured Quatre in acknowledgement as he looked back at his vidscreen.

The Chinese preventers agent commented, “Your sister is an hour late.”

“I know. I'm sorry about that. I just received word that they're having trouble regulating the atmospheric conditions in L3. All flights have been cancelled.” The blonde took a sip of coffee and tried to appear as apologetic as possible. He'd asked Wufei to accompany his sister Midori to Guangdong. She was in need of a translator. Wufei was the only person Quatre knew who could speak a certain dying dialect of Chinese.

Wufei muttered something about the unreliability of women.

Quatre apologized once more and assumed his communication with Wufei was over but the Chinese pilot suddenly leaned closer to the screen and squinted.

“You have a nervous tic,” noted Wufei.

“A nervous tic?” The blond looked mortified and then confused.

Wufei managed a matter-of-fact expression. “Duo is up to something again, isn't he? Every time he is, you start twitching like a rabbit. What is it this time? Is he shirking Relena duty again?”

“Duo's not up to anything, Wufei. As of Tuesday, he's been on leave--”

“There it is again,” interjected Wufei while pointing at Quatre. His finger appeared abnormally large on screen.

Slightly agitated, Quatre could only sputter, “Wh-what?”

“There, you did it again. That nervous twitch you only have been Duo is plotting something. For some gods-awful reason, he informs you of all his sordid going ons.”

“…” Quatre's mouth hung open. In the back of his mind, he recalled Duo's sinister expression and his declaration to put Heero out of commission… “I—I'm not quite sure what you mean.”

“Right,” murmured Wufei as watched Quatre bring a shaky mug of coffee to his lips.

The blonde fidgeted outside Duo and Heero's apartment door. He readjusted the pair of goggles on his forehead and stared at the door. He swallowed. What he was doing was in Heero's best interest. Yes, that was right. He wasn't snooping, not at all.

He finally reached out and knocked on the door. There came the sound of crashing furniture followed by muffled cursing. Then the door was opened to reveal a half-dressed Duo. The American rubbed at his knee before looking back at Quatre to say, “You don't usually visit without calling first.”

The blonde coughed before replying, “I was in the neighborhood and decided to drop in.”

“You just happened to go by the dumping site and decided to pop in?”

A bead of sweat ran down the side of Quatre's nose as Duo inspected him.

The American shrugged and said, “Ok.” He began walking back into the apartment.

Quatre followed him in and looked at the surroundings. All the furniture in the living room had been moved to one corner. There was a large mattress at the room's center and about ten empty glasses surrounding the mattress itself.

Duo suddenly turned around. He scratched at his bare chest as he looked back at Quatre. “What's with the goggles?”

The blonde's face grew red. “These?” he squeaked while pointing to the pair resting on top of his head.

“Yeah those. Haven't seen them in years. Building a secret replica of Sandrock?”

“No…of course not.…”

Duo turned around and began moving to the fridge. “Want something to drink?”

“No thank you,” responded Quatre as he eyed Duo carefully as he took the goggles off in one sweep. “Where's Heero,” he asked as nonchalantly as possible. He watched as Duo left the fridge with a large pitcher of milk in hand. Duo walked over to the mattress and began filling the glasses as he said, “No clue, but he should be back in 5 minutes.” Duo turned to give Quatre a meaningful look.

In turn, Quatre murmured, “I should leave then.” He wasn't stupid. It was quite obvious what Duo was setting up for.

“Yep,” responded Duo in confirmation as he filled the last glass. “I'll pop over tomorrow with the good news.”

“Good news?”

There came an evil smirk from Duo.

At that, Quatre turned to leave. He sort of speed-walked out of the apartment. He'd even forgotten to say “good-bye” to Duo but he did manage to close the apartment door behind him.

He leaned against the closed door and took a deep breath. He thought of the goggles he'd purposely left behind. He thought of the position he'd left them in: in perfect view of the mattress. And he thought of the little camera that was positioned between the two goggle lenses, where it had always been.

Quatre stood from his semi-slumped position and began to walk away. For years, the other pilots had never questioned why he'd seemed so keen to wear those goggles during the war, even when the desert was hundreds of miles away. The blonde sighed guiltily. It was a simple matter of recording information. And something he'd never mentioned to the other pilots. And for good reason.
----

Want to know more about Guangdong? Go here: http://www.gznet.edu.cn/WWW/scn/guangdong/e_gd.html